Its been a year now since my daughter was born. Its amazing that I spent almost 2 years getting pregnant with her, went through a miscarriage with twins, then the whole time I was pregnant I complained about it because I was huge and uncomfortable...then she was colicky and I was in a hurry for her to get over that. A year later...she is perfect, but I feel like I did not really embrace the whole experience, so I feel kind of empty, like I missed out on the whole newborn/baby stage.
Sorry to hear about your miscarriage, although it is wonderful to hear that you finally were able to have a child. Congratulations :-D
It's kind of hard to make out the picture of what your holding but I get the idea. It looks like your holding a black void up to your body. I like the vintage look.
we miscarried between our two kids, and I never really complained about being pregnant w/ my youngest, but I never really acknowledged or embraced the pregnancy ...like i was always waiting for the "other shoe to drop"...
I know what you mean about the 'emptiness'.
"but I feel like I did not really embrace the whole experience, so I feel kind of empty, like I missed out on the whole newborn/baby stage."
if you can look at her right now and know how much you love her then it doesn't matter how you may have felt then. yours is not an uncommon sentiment. letting it lead you to doubt yourself or fill you with regret is an easy mistake to make. if you start with your own happiness and work from there i think that you'll see that things dont have to be perfect for your family to be happy. be humble and appreciate the things you love and the things that make you feel loved. the rest is all just math and chemistry really.
I don't know why I haven't commented on this yet. Perhaps because it hits so close to home. It also took us over 3 years to conceive, ( how much do you hate what those drugs do to you!!) Maddie is our only and we almost lost her at 3 weeks due to a really rare blood disorder. She was 4.4 lbs when she was born, so tiny...so frail. She was a sick little girl for a long time and now I look at her and just am in awe. I also miscarried last Janruary and am having another go at Clomid, which I had to use to get pregnant both times. YUCK. I'm soooo not looking forward to it, but hey...you do what you have to do. Kids are the most special things in this world. I so understand feeling that loss and also missing those moments when they were young. But that is why you were gifted with this photography talent. To capture these amazing moments.
-- Make someone smile today.
********************** **Please remember that my work is NOT to be used without my permission. It is not for stock use**
You are so brave to be trying to conceive again. It is such an emotional journey. I would love to have more children, but I am so scared to even go through the TRYING...let alone the pregnancy.
We are so lucky to have our two girls, and if for some reason we are never blessed with more, than I have to be alright with that. Your Maddie is a darling...obviously the joy of your lives. People were always telling me when I was trying for Katie after the miscarriage, Why can't you be happy with what you have?" And its not about that...because I was and really am happy with Mikki. Its about wanting to share your love with another little being that you created.
Big Hugs. I hope that the next pregnancy does not take so long to acheive! Clomid, with all of its downfalls, is a miracle drug.
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It's kind of hard to make out the picture of what your holding but I get the idea. It looks like your holding a black void up to your body. I like the vintage look.
I know what you mean about the 'emptiness'.
Excellent capture!
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My Facebook | =nukieu
if you can look at her right now and know how much you love her then it doesn't matter how you may have felt then. yours is not an uncommon sentiment. letting it lead you to doubt yourself or fill you with regret is an easy mistake to make. if you start with your own happiness and work from there i think that you'll see that things dont have to be perfect for your family to be happy. be humble and appreciate the things you love and the things that make you feel loved. the rest is all just math and chemistry really.
--
**********************
**Please remember that my work is NOT to be used without my permission. It is not for stock use**
CURSE YOU IMAGE THIEVES!!!!!!
We are so lucky to have our two girls, and if for some reason we are never blessed with more, than I have to be alright with that. Your Maddie is a darling...obviously the joy of your lives. People were always telling me when I was trying for Katie after the miscarriage, Why can't you be happy with what you have?" And its not about that...because I was and really am happy with Mikki. Its about wanting to share your love with another little being that you created.
Big Hugs. I hope that the next pregnancy does not take so long to acheive! Clomid, with all of its downfalls, is a miracle drug.
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